Wednesday, September 7, 2016

Look For The Rainbow

I don't think that looking for the rainbow is just a metaphorical suggestion even though the suggestion that we look for miracles and reasons for optimism is compelling and powerful.  I try to do that every day.
However, I also look for and delight in the discovery of actual rainbows.
Physics informs us that a rainbow is a meteorological phenomenon caused by reflection, refraction and dispersion of light in water droplets resulting in a spectrum of light.
Okay.  Got that.
I have twice witnessed rainbows in the making.  The first was in 1995.  I was sitting on a porch in Brooklyn just looking at the sky.  Suddenly I realized that something was happening.  The sky just looked different in a kind of unformed forming sort of way.  And then the rainbow materialized.
Last night I again witnessed the creation of a rainbow.  I went outside because the sky was so beautiful.  And then, just like on that Brooklyn porch, the sky seemed to be forming or making room in itself for the birth of the rainbow.  Then suddenly there is was.  It was visible just about long enough for me to take this picture.  Then it was gone.
Rainbows are, to me, magic.  I will continue looking for the rainbow in both metaphor and life.
Each time I find the rainbow I will remember that miracles happen.  Sometimes we just need to look for them.

Sunday, September 4, 2016

New Jersey Does Ice Cream

Summer comes and the ice cream places open up.  Summer will soon end and with its departure the ice cream places will close for the long winter.  New Jersey does ice cream.  People drive distances just for a cone or a dish.  New Jersey also does summer.  The days of summer, though, are waning.  Soon the leaves will turn and, yes, most of the ice cream places will close.  Jakes.  Ryans.  Four Boys.  Hoffman's will stay open.  Maybe Rita's Ice Custard Happiness will also weather the winter.  Otherwise where could we order and then pick up happiness?
I love ice cream.  I don't do cones, though.  I find eating an ice cream cone about as stressful as it gets.  It's just too much with which to deal.  You've got the melting ice cream.  Then you've got the crumbling, wet cone.  I can't manage the stress.  I eat my ice cream out of a cup or a bowl.  I'm not ashamed to do so.
And the ice cream places don't seem to begrudge me my dish.  They still get paid.  And I still get the ice cream.

Saturday, September 3, 2016

So Who Was Mildred Greensfelder?

Not too long ago we spent a week in Provincetown, Massachusetts.  Almost every evening we visited the Mildred Greensfelder Playground adoring our favorite two-year-old as he climbed and ran and laughed.  It's a wonderful playground.  Each evening in addition to admiring my grandson I wondered who, exactly, was Mildred Greensfelder and what did she do to get a park named in her honor.
There isn't much information available about old Mildred.  However, I did learn something about her activism in a book called "Provincetown:  From Pilgrim Landing to Gay Resort" written by Karen Christel Krahulik who is almost as obscure as Mildred Greensfelder.  Anyway, Ms. Krahulik tells us that in March, 1949, a guy named Edward Roach set off a firestorm in Provincetown because he said that the high school's play depicted people of color in a racist manner.  Mr. Roach did acknowledge that there was probably no harm intended but nevertheless harm was committed.  A lot of P-Town residents strongly, dare I say vehemently,  objected to Roach's comments.  Mildred Greensfelder was apparently one of the many voices shouting down Roach's concerns.  She stated the belief that rather than being critical the town should embrace all attempts to accept and encourage diversity and that the play whether or not it succeeded made that attempt.  She concluded her published remarks by reminding people that the Provincetown residents should always embrace gaiety and laughter.
And so they have.
Right on, Mildred and thanks to Karen Christel Krahulik for shedding a little insight into the life of the woman in whose honor children laugh and play.

Friday, September 2, 2016

Well Whoa It's Been Awhile

Time flies when you're living life, apparently.  At any rate I apologize to you and to myself for my absence.  In my defense, however, you should know that I have just completed a book.  It is now in the design phase and hopefully will be published soon.
No, it's not a novel.  There are more of those in the works.  This book is inspirational in nature.  It's called "Stick With Us And We'll Get You There:  How To Be Where You Want To Be On The Road And In Life".  I wrote it in collaboration with Jeff Baugh.  Those of you living in the Los Angeles area know his voice well.  He's the guy who every morning and evening tells you how to get where you want to be on the road.
I'll be posting snatches from the book just to whet your appetite.
In the meantime, it's back to business here in blog land with the things I care about and about which you hopefully also care.
Off we go - again.

Friday, July 15, 2016

Between a Rock and a Hard Place

Study Session for Sisterhood Shabbat at Etz Chaim/Monroe Township Jewish Center, Parashah Chukkat

Numbers 20:1-2
The Israelites arrived in a body at the wilderness of Zin on the first new moon and the people stayed at Kadesh.  Miriam died there and was buried there. And there was no water for the congregation and they joined against Moses and Aaron.

AND THERE WAS NO WATER FOR THE CONGREGATION - Since this statement follows immediately after the mention of Miriam’s death, we may learn from it that during the entire forty years they had the “well” through Miriam’s merit.         
--Rashi’s commentary on Numbers 20:2

As soon as the well ceased flowing, Israel gathered around Moshe and Aharon, who were weeping for Miriam.  G’d told them: “Because you are mourning, shall all Israel die of thirst? Stand up, take your staff, and give water to Israel.”
 -Tzena U’rena

Numbers 20:10-12
Moses and Aaron assembled the congregation in front of the rock and he said to them, “Listen, you rebels, shall we get water for you out of this rock?” And Moses raised his hand and struck the rock twice with his rod.  Out came copious water, and the community and their beasts drank.  But G’d said to Moses and Aaron, “Because you did not trust Me enough to affirm My sanctity in the sight of the Israelite people, therefore you shall not lead this congregation into the land that I have given them”.

BECAUSE YOU DID NOT TRUST ME — Scripture discloses the fact that but for this sin alone, they would have entered the land of Canaan, in order that people should not say of them, “Even as the sin of the generation of the Wilderness (a term used of those who left Egypt) on whom it was decreed that they should not enter the Land was the sin of Moses and Aaron” (cf. Rashi on Numbers 27:13). But was not the doubting question (cf. Rashi on Numbers 11:22), “shall the sheep and oxen be slaughtered for them?” a more grievous lack of faith in God than this? But because that had been said in private (no Israelites being present and therefore it could have no evil influence upon them), Scripture (God) spared him (and did not make his lack of faith public by pronouncing punishment for it), but here, where all Israel were standing by, Scripture does not spare him because of the Hallowing of the Divine Name.       
 --Rashi’s commentary on Numbers 20:12
The sin consisted in their saying: “Are we to extract water for you from this rock?” They should have said instead: “G’d will extract water for you.”. In Exodus 16:8 Moses had been careful to phrase the announcement of the forthcoming phenomenon of manna by attributing it to coming directly from G’d. Similarly, when predicting any of the other miracles which had been announce beforehand, Moses had carefully attributed the miracle to G’d. By failing to do so this time they left the way open for some of the people to think that the water when it would gush forth would be the result of Moses’ and Aaron’s combined knowledge.
--Rabbi Chananel on Numbers 20:12

His whole sin lay in erring on the side of anger…when he used the expression, ‘listen, you rebels!’ The Holy One, blessed be, censured him for this, that a man of his stature should give vent to anger in front of the whole community of Israel.
 –Moses Maimonides, Shmona P’rakim

Judaism teaches that the greater the man, the stricter the standard by which he is judged, and, if he does not measure up, the greater will be his judgment and punishment.
–Rabbi Samson Raphael Hirsch

Sunday, July 3, 2016

The Day I Drove Elie Wiesel Across Los Angeles County

This is my most recent Huffington Post Article which can be found at:
 On Sunday, March 29, 1998, Elie Wiesel spoke in Bridges Auditorium
at the Claremont Colleges in Claremont, California. Days before
Wiesel’s scheduled address Rabbi Leslie Bergson, Hillel Director and
Chaplain for the colleges, with profound generosity asked if my
daughter, Jesse, and I would like to drive Mr. Wiesel to his next
speaking engagement. We immediately accepted her invitation.
The Rabbi would also accompany us.
Claremont, California, is at the far eastern edge of Los Angeles County.
Mr. Wiesel’s next speaking engagement was on the far northwestern
border of Los Angeles County. Under normal circumstances the drive
could take up to two hours. Normal circumstances could not possibly
have applied to this day in 1998. I felt an all-consuming terror filled
with what ifs. What if I made a mistake? What if another driver made
a mistake? What if the Jeep broke down or had a flat tire? What if
he didn’t like riding in a Jeep Cherokee?
What if he preferred riding in a vehicle with automatic transmission
instead of one with standard transmission? What if? What if?
What if?
My vehicle then and now is a 1996 Jeep Cherokee. There’s nothing
fancy about that Jeep. I doubted if it was ‘good enough’ for Mr. Wiesel.
Surely he deserved the very best mode of transportation I could provide.
I considered renting a Lincoln Town Car or some other worthy
automobile. And then the night before his scheduled speech I read
the weather forecast. Rain. Lots of rain. I decided that we would all
be safer if I drove a vehicle with which I was familiar.
That Sunday morning I went to the car wash. It was, of course, closed.
Car washes generally do close when it rains. So Jesse and I cleaned
up the Jeep as best as we could. Then off we went to Claremont.
When we pulled into the Bridges Auditorium parking lot I informed the
security guard that I would be driving Elie Wiesel to his next
speaking engagement. The guard, although appropriately doubtful,
told me where to park.
Once inside the auditorium my daughter and I first located Rabbi Bergson
who pointed us to the man in the front row.
“Hello,” I said to him. “I’m your driver.”
Elie Wiesel took my hand and thanked me. He hoped driving him
was not too terrible an inconvenience. I mumbled something incoherent
and then sat down.
A security guard approached me with instructions.
“Go backstage when he’s finished. I will guide you out the door to
your vehicle. It will be cordoned off by security. No one will be able
to approach.”
Mr. Wiesel’s address was amazing. In it he movingly spoke of years after the
liberation placing his hands on the same cement balustrade as Hitler. He
reminded us that history often lacks justice but frequently contains irony.
His speech ended and we followed security to the parking lot. My Jeep
was, indeed, cordoned off. Even though his address had ended just
moments before, a crowd had already gathered in the rain.
A man shouted out, “Elie, you taught me to play chess in the camps!”
Mr. Wiesel stopped and in the rain asked the man if he still played. The man
said that he did. Mr. Wiesel encouraged him to keep playing.
And then we were in the Jeep. I assured Mr. Wiesel that my research had
indicated that he was safest in back of me. He replied that he felt safe
regardless of where he sat. Headlights and wipers on, we left Claremont
with Rabbi Bergson in front with me and Jesse in back with Elie Wiesel. I
drove with white knuckles and depended on my passengers to make
conversation. He and Rabbi Bergson shared the latest news from
Hebrew Union College-Jewish Institute of Religion. My daughter pointed
out sights such as the Rose Bowl. They chatted. Jesse confided to him that
she felt challenged by her math class. He confided to her that he had also
been challenged by math. They formed a bond born of common challenge.
Later my daughter shared that she felt fascinated by his hands and all that
they had touched including Hitler’s balustrade.
I did not speak until we arrived at his next engagement.
We got out of the car and in the rain I said, “Mr. Wiesel, I would love to take
a picture of you. I hate to do it out here in the rain but I’m afraid they won’t
let us take pictures inside.”
This incredibly humble man said the only thing that hinted of his awareness
of his place in the world.
“Mary,” he said. “They will let you take my picture wherever I want you
to take it.”
Once inside and out of the rain, Elie Wiesel put his arms around Rabbi
Bergson and my daughter and I took the picture. I then told him that I was
reading his book “Night” to my sixth grade religions school class.
His reply was, “Never stop reading and never stop remembering.
He then thanked me for the ride, hugged us all, and went off to speak
My friend Carole later asked me how it felt to drive a world treasure and
have his life in my hands.
I thought a moment and then told her that it felt a lot like driving my daughter
and having her life in my hands because they were both world treasures.
My friend agreed with my reasoning. I suspect so, too, would the very humble
and very real man I drove across Los Angeles County on that rainy
March day.
We are blessed by the life and memory of Elie Wiesel. I am blessed to
have been his driver.

Wednesday, June 22, 2016

The Stop Must Start Somewhere

We are a violent society.  This isn't news.  We don't need mass shootings to remind us that we are violent.  Our language is violent.  Our entertainment is violent.  Our lives are violent.  I've been giving this situation a lot of thought lately and decided that I must start somewhere.  Here is the somewhere.  I will be writing about domestic violence on a regular basis.  I don't that that at this point it much matters where we focus our attention as long as the focus is on decreasing the violence in our society.
I have chosen the following organizations as resources for my writings:
The Joyful Heart Foundation -
NoMore -
And to get us started, here's some important information.  We've got to start someplace.  I'm starting here.

Need help?

If you or someone you know has experienced sexual assault or domestic violence you can call to speak to a counselor or be referred to local services: