Sunday, August 1, 2010

Ray Hoagland Live At Bed Bath and Beyond

Well, probably not really because if that were the case he would be well over a hundred years old and would certainly have ventured past that bend in the Pleasant Valley Road -- a event far more unlikely than being alive and living well over a hundred years of age.
At least, though, his sense of honesty in business was alive the other day at Bed Bath and Beyond into which we had wandered to replace our age worn quilt.  Near the check out counter I saw the new Dyson blade-less fan and just had to stop and marvel at what to me is nothing less than a miracle of technology -- a fan with no blades.  I put my hand in it and lost no fingers.  There were no visible moving parts.
Still excited about this product for which I have absolutely no use and no intention to purchase, I said to the sales clerk something like, "Wow!  Have you ever seen anything like that?"
The sales clerk stared at me for a long moment before replying, "It's a fan.  It doesn't have any blades."
My enthusiasm could not be diminished.
"Yeah," said I.  "That's the point.  How does it work?"
The sales clerk proved that not all enthusiasm is contagious.
"I don't care how it works.  It costs over three hundred dollars.  A regular fan -- one that has blades covered so well you couldn't get your fingers to the blades if you wanted to -- costs about fifty.  Use your head."
We paid for the comforter and left the store.
That sales clerk won't get any awards for pushing merchandise that people can neither afford nor actually need.
However, if they start giving out annual Ray Hoagland Tell the Customer The Way It Is awards she will receive the first.
By the way, we weren't going to buy the fan.  Who would?  I mean, it's a fan.  It just doesn't have any blades!"

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Great story. The clerk's enthusiasm will definitely not gain her any rewards. But, then she's like the majority of the clerks these days - they don't want to help and could care less if you have any questions they can't answer. I wonder if her oss knows what a "great" salesperson she is? Interesting?